Free
by Troublesome-monkey-dono
Summary: Fifteen years is a long time. Raze wonders exactly when did Lily stop loving him. MK2.


Summary: Fifteen years is a long time. Raze wonders exactly when did Lily stop loving him. MK2.

Note: Well hello, This is Troublesome_monkey_dono signing in! This is my very first fanfic for any videogame I believe. Now, I haven't played Mana Khemia 2 in 3 years so I'm not sure if I even remotely got any facts correct for this story. Since I have no time to play (blame pursing a bachelor's degree in medicine) I'll have to rely on memory. So sorry in advance if there are gaping inconsistencies. Yes, the characters will be terribly OC. Sorry for that.

Disclaimer: As the term fanfic implies, I have no rights to this game or any of the affiliated characters.

* * *

**Free**

* * *

Fifteen Years.

A dainty hand fingered the handle of the porcelain teacup, a finger tracing the detailed pattern absentmindedly. "Has it really been that long?" she wondered aloud. Carefully, she reclined back into a velvet armchair, the hand resting under her chin as she relaxed into her arm. "I could have sworn it was only yesterday when we graduated…." She muttered to herself.

"Still talking to yourself I see." A warm hand gently placed itself on her right shoulder and the masculine voice behind chuckled at her shock. Light blue eyes twinkled with amusement as he watched the young woman practically jump a foot up before gripping her fingers in a vice grip and screeching, "Unhand me heathen! You have no idea what -"

The amused chuckle silenced her for a moment and she turned to face the man behind her, face reddening in disbelief. "Raze!" she had all but shouted, "Don't do that! You know I hate it when you do that!" She swatted his hand away quickly; face reddening even more in embarrassment. She hid her face behind her white gloved hands before straightening up from her position. She smoothed the creases of her dress and straightened her back. "Anyway," she coughed out, "Sit down."

She pointed to the armchair that sat in front of her, eyes carefully taking in the young man that eased himself easily into the seat. She bit her lip. "It really has been fifteen years," she thought to herself. Raze has grown. Well of course he hasn't physically grown that much, she rationalized to herself, but Razeluxe Meitzen has…changed. "Yes," she thought, "changed is the word." Raze sat in front of her, taller than she bothered to remember. His face was framed by long light blue hair which was tied back in a long ponytail and his black traveling cloak obscured his muscular frame. She half wondered whether he was competing with Flay on who could boast the longest hair and muscled body.

Silently, she leaned forward and fixed him a cup of tea; the exact way she remembered he liked it. "Really," she berated herself as she poured, "since when do I ever serve tea? Especially to Raze of all people?" She was almost tempted to slap down the teapot and demand Raze to get of his high horse and pour the damn tea himself if he wanted it so badly. Still, she carried on her task, painfully aware that the man watched her just as carefully from across the table. Perhaps he expected the same. She smiled to herself, rolling her eyes slightly. Well time has changed her as well.

"So," she drawled out conversationally, "what bought this visit on? You aren't the kind of person to visit without a reason." She pushed the tea towards him with a civil smile before reaching for her own drink. Silently, her mind began reeling. Why was Raze here now? Why would he be visiting now? Why does he have to come when she was alone in the house? Where the hell are the maids and butlers? Where the hell is Whim!? Who let him in here?! Why does he -

Raze tilted his head at her, the signature smirk of his decorating his handsome face. "Must there be reason to visit my old master?" he answered back smoothly.

Lily's eyes snapped up from the tea she pressed against her lips, taking a slow sip as she watched him warily. "Are you insinuating that I'm old?" she probed back just as fast. Her face scrunched in irritation, which made Raze only laugh, much to her displeasure.

"You are older than me, "he rebutted pleasantly. He half expected Lily to bite back, but she merely huffed into her cup and looked away from him. And then there was silence. Terrible, awkward, irritating silence. Honestly, he was surprised. He recalled much of his childhood with her screeching angrily at him, loud words of exaggeration and drama that was complemented by a zealous imagination. Lily had always been known to be obnoxiously loud. And yet…

"How are you?" he started once more, voice lowering into a gentle degree that he could only manage for delicate children. "I trust your husband is well?"

And finally, Lily looked up from her silence to give a curt nod. He could tell she was nervous, unsure how to act around him. Admittedly, this was almost normal for her. She had spent a majority of their childhood entertaining romantic fantasies of drama between her and him. It often ended with hilarious conclusions that he could only chuckle about now. She cleared her throat once more, "Uhm…yes. Chroix is well. He's off to a meeting and won't be home from another two days…."

She left it at that, convinced she had given him enough information that would end his interrogation about her husband. Husband. Even after 5 years, she's never once gotten use to that word. Perhaps it was because Chroix was never the husband she had envisioned she'd be married to. She certainly would have never envisioned herself chatting about her husband to the man she had always assumed she would marry. However he seemed quite unnerved by the thought of it. "And you?" she pressed, ignoring the growing lump in the back of her throat, "How is Et?"

Raze smiled back, admittedly a bit bored at the small talk that was ensuing in a much slower rate than he'd ever imagined. "I wouldn't know," he answered honestly, "haven't seen her in two years." He watched as Lily's face bloomed with surprise. He always liked that about her. While she didn't intend to express her emotions so freely, her face had always painted her feelings so easily. She had always been an open book. Up until five years ago, that is.

Finally, she placed the teacup down, eliciting a conversation that was not so dreadfully awkward as before. Yet, as she stared at the man longer and longer, the more she felt like she was drowning. Breathless. Hopeless? "Is she alright?" she ventured to ask, clearing her throat once more. She cursed herself for her incessant noise making. What the hell is happening to her?

"I suppose," Raze answered with shrug, "I met Yun a couple of months ago and he said she's gone off travelling again."

"Ah…"

She had trailed off into silence once more, twiddling with the lace detail of her dress. The bright diamond that fitted her ring finger glittered in the light. Finally annoyed, Raze sighed out loud and grabbed the handle of teacup to distract himself. Again. Again with this awkward silence. It was infuriating how quiet she suddenly was. She was never like this. Lily was never silent. "Lily, when did this happen to us?" he wondered aloud.

"Hm?"

Irked, he gestured at the eerie calm that surround them. "This," he answered back suddenly tired, "This silence. Since when did we ever stay in a room together and never once make a sound?" He stared back at her, silently sipping his tea. He couldn't help but keep a smile that tugged on the corners of his lips. Just the way he liked it.

"Who knows," she evenly answered, "my wedding perhaps?" And finally the steely blue eyes settled on him. "Or perhaps….the day I decided to let you go."

"Ah…"

* * *

**_(Six years ago)_**

_"I'm letting you go." Lily's statement stopped him in his tracks. He ventured to look her way. The ever incessant scowl marred her pretty face, as she placed her fists squarely beside her hips. Her chin jutted out in stubbornness, jaws clenching and eyes narrowing almost viciously. He noticed that she started to shiver and her cheeks and nose were dusted a fine pink because of the cold day._

_"What?"_

_"I…I-I'm setting you free…." Lily hesitated for a moment, her voice lowering into gentle mutter. She stared at him for a moment, mouth opening as if to say more but clamping shut almost immediately. Finally, eyes downcast, she turned and stomped away from him. He rolled his eyes. Ever the dramatic lunatic she was._

_He hurried to catch up to her, falling into a brisk pace. Amused he answered, "So you're setting me free is it? Does that mean I get to rest for the day?" He prodded her for a quick biting answer, hoping that she'd agree. He had half bended his back over and under today, fetching items for her like a mindless dog while she completed another half brained synchronization Et had somehow convinced her to make. His body ached for a hot bad and a warm bed, at least for tonight before he was back on duty._

_She had stopped in her march, head downcast as her bangs hid her face. "No…" she answered hoarsely, "I meant…I…you can go now."_

_"Oh, good." He silently thanked the divine beings above for his time off. Not bothering to question it any further he turned to leave. "See you in the morning."_

_"NO!" Lily's infuriated scream halted him. He rolled his eyes again. Of course, he was hoping for too much again wasn't he? With a sigh, he turned to face her once more and stared at the sight. Lily stood there, holding back sobs. He winced as he took in her tearfully sad face, one hand covering her mouth as she tried to calm her whimpers and the other wrapped around her torso as if it were meant to shield herself from him. "N-NO!" she whimpered out pathetically._

_Raze only watched, unsure how he would handle this situation. It has been years when he's faced a crying Lily. He was never good at comforting damsels in distress and he certainly had no idea how to comfort this girl. "What the hell?" he muttered out, "Why are you crying?"_

_"I meant….," she swallowed as she tried to form words, "I meant….You could leave! Go! Leave and… a-and never come back!" She had all but screamed those words before she turned and ran. He watched as she practically flew up the banister, hands covering her face and sobbing her little heart out. "Goodbye Raze!" she managed to bawl out, "Goodbye forever!"_

_And he was left there staring at her retreating figure like an idiot. "What the hell was that!?" he wondered out loud. He crossed his arms puzzled, wincing when he heard the slamming of doors overhead. He sighed. He wasn't quite sure what happened there. He was certain he hadn't angered her so profusely today. He managed to follow most of her directions, however outlandish they were. He was even sure she was in a good mood after she finished her synchronization. So then, what the hell did he witness just now!?_

_Looking around, he cursed the day when Whim was not there to trail after their master. Whim had been dragged by Et someplace, ordered to help retrieve something or another. So, as much as it almost pained him to do, he swiftly followed after her._

_It had taken him a good fifteen minutes before he to coax her into letting him enter her bedroom. Of course, it had taken him another thirty minutes to find the key to her door. And now it seemed, it will take him a good hour to coax her out of her bathroom. Bored, he sat on the ground leaning against the wall next to the bathroom, one hand lazily rapping the door. "Lily this is ridiculous. Get out of there before your father comes in thinking you'd drown in the bathtub. Come on!"_

_He was tempted to just leave; to let her wallow in her tears. Perhaps she'd cry herself to sleep, wake up just as obnoxious as always and order him around just like before. However, he's never seen her react so violently towards him like this. And in fact, it was almost troubling._

_The only answer he got from the woman was silence. In response he only sighed with irritation, as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. "Fine, then at least explain to me why you're crying. Being all dramatic about it won't help you."_

_It was another ten minutes of silence before he heard the bathroom door creak open. He watched as Lily poked her head out, eyes widening as she caught sight of him sitting on the ground. She had almost managed to slam it shut, but even she could not beat his speed. He managed to pry it open just enough, using his strength against her._

_"Raze!" she cried out in frustration. He caught sight of her face and couldn't help but shake his head as he pulled the door open. Before him was a terribly pathetic sight. One of Lily's pigtails had come undone and her blonde hair had thrown itself in a haphazard direction. Her puffy and wet eyes, reddened cheeks and nose, and incessant sniffling was not helping her image either. "Damn it Raze! Stop making this harder for me!" she hissed out._

_"I'm making this harder?" he shot back as he finally threw open the door and forced his way in. "You're the only one who is making this harder! What the hell are you doing!?" The anger and annoyance finally caught up with him. He frowned distastefully at her, cursing her for the time wasted where he could have been in bed relaxing._

_"I told you!" she cried as she shrunk away from him. She had trodden back until the back of her legs hit the sides of her bathtub. "I told you that I was setting you free! Stop already!" And finally the damn broke and she released her sobs again, "J-just stop making this harder for me! Please Raze, Just go!"_

_He stood there awkwardly, staring as she sobbed. Finally he seemed to understand. "You….you're terminating the contract?" he ventured to ask. He was only met with hiccups and sniffles. Warily he took a tentative step forward and asked again, "You're saying that I'm no longer your servant?"_

_Finally, she looked at him, blue eyes brimming with tears. He took in the sadness that was etched across her face, shallow breathing indicating how much pain she must be feeling. "I don't understand Lily," he said, "did your father say something?"_

_Lily hiccupped and dropped herself down to sit on the ledge of the bathtub. Mutely, she shook her head. Hand trembling she gestured for him to go, unwilling to see him any longer. "I…I'm letting you go," she whimpered out weakly, "I'm setting you free." It seemed she was trying harder to convince herself rather than to answer him. After a moment of silence, Raze strode over and sat down next to her, being careful not to touch her._

_"I don't think so Lily," he said after a while, "you can't just terminate our contract like that. There are implications, you know. Rules to abide by."_

_"….why not?" she questioned after a while. Tearfully, she finally caught the courage to stare back at him. He couldn't help but notice how frightfully pale she was now, shivering like a leaf, unsure whether she could stand on her own two feet. "Why can't I just let you go?" she wondered aloud. Biting her lip hard she pressed, "Why can't I just….why can't I just move on? Why can't I set your free and let you live own life!?"_

_"I'm not a bird Lily," he stated bluntly, "you can't just set me free just like that."_

_Venomously she stared at him, before withdrawing and turning away like a wounded animal. "I wish you were a bird," she stated with all seriousness, "I wish you were just like bird so that I wouldn't feel so attached to you."_

_And she had hit the issue like a bull's eye. So this is what this is all about. "Lily," he said shaking his head, "if you don't want me to go, then why are you forcing it? Why don't you just do what you always do and order me around, try to plan dates, do what you always do?"_

_"Because you don't love me."_

_He was efficiently silenced after that, watching with wide eyes as she slowly turned to him. She had wrapped both arms around herself now, covering herself from the shame that had plastered itself on her face. He saw her embarrassment, her frustration, her pain. And it clamped him shut._

_"Because," she said with such even conviction she managed to stop her stammering. Her face became almost peaceful as she continued. "…..because no matter how much I may love you, you can never feel the same. Because no matter how hard I try to show you I love you, you will never do that same."_

_She had taken an intake of breath, breath hitching for a second as the tears managed to fight their way to the surface. "Be…Because," she had ventured on, "every time I try to make you fall in love with me, I'm reminded that you never will." Sucking in a harsh breath she stood up shaking, "So please Razeluxe…. Please."_

_"…Lily…."_

_"Let me forget."_

* * *

**_(Five years ago)_**

_"What is this?" He fingered the white envelope cautiously, flipping it over and over again as if he expected it to blow up._

_"Just open it silly!" Et cried out, arms waving over her head in excitement. "It's a letter from Lily! Open Raze! Come on!" She jumped up and down, urging the man to open it before she would tire of his wariness and rip it open herself._

_"So it is," Raze muttered to himself. Of course it is. He recognized the seal that had been stamped over the wax sealing anywhere. Finally opening it, he pulled the content from its case and glanced over it uninterested._

_As he scanned, Et watched his bored face suddenly grow into a frown. "What!?" she cried out, "What!?"_

_Shaking his head he stared down at it incredulously. "It's from Lily," he stated out loud. He frowned as he flipped the card accordingly._

_"Well of course it is!" Et cried out, "What else could it be! What does it say Raze!? What does it say!?"_

_"It's a wedding invitation."_

* * *

**(Present)**

Coughing out loud, Raze tried vainly to steer the conversation away from such a dangerous topic. He tried to reason with himself that he had come here for a pleasant chat. He had hoped that because it has been six years ago since that day, he was sure that Lily and he had grown up and matured. He had been sure that the changes would help overcome the overly awkward situation that they were in now. And now, as they sat in ever presently sickening awkwardness, he could only slap himself silently for his stupidity.

Lily and he never received closure about the issue. Hell, it was as if they merely brushed past the issue. After that fateful talk, he had all but gotten up and left. He had gone straight to his room, packed what he could, taken what money he had (though he was surprised how his bank account had exploded exponentially for some reason) and had marched out without a word of goodbye to her. He had tried to say goodbye to the rest, but even he had a hard time saying his goodbyes to Whim. Perhaps out of everyone, she had taken his farewell the best. She had awarded him with a warm hug and kiss on the cheek, before pushing him away with words of goodbye and good travels. And he's never looked back.

Until now.

He took in Lily's appearance now. The last time he saw the woman was that day. He had not bothered to attend her wedding and had not entered her world until today. His last vision of the painfully pathetic girl he had left behind was a stark contrast to the woman that sat across from him now. Lily's trademark pigtails and frills were gone. She had opted to wear her blonde hair down, letting her naturally wavy hair curl around her delicate shoulders. The light blue and ivory dress she wore contrasted beautifully with the color of her eyes. Gone was the obnoxious girl of his youth and here this stranger stands.

His eyes had traveled down and settled on the hand on her abdomen. She had placed it there securely, covering the small swell of her stomach as she twiddled with the lace detail of her dress. It was not noticeable in the beginning, but to the trained eye it was obvious. "You're pregnant," he had stated bluntly.

She smiled sincerely, perhaps the first of the day, and nodded, "Yes. Three months."

Clearing her throat he leaned forward with a smile, "Congratulations."

"Thank you."

The smile that was trained on his face dimmed a little. Lily with a child. Such a concept. He couldn't wrap his head around it actually. He had always thought she was always so very childish. Her outburst and tantrums could have beaten real children. And now here she was, getting ready to have one. Frowning, he finally sighed and leaned back tiredly. "Lily, you are right. I came here for a reason."

Finally tearing her eyes away from her twiddling she nodded, "Continue."

He fought back a smile. Quite reminiscent of the old days. "I came here for closure," he said as he straightened himself.

It was Lily's turn to cock her head in confusion. "Closure?"

It took a second for Raze to formulate his next words. He picked at them cautiously, afraid perhaps to anger a pregnant woman. Yet, he knew he had to let it go today. To finally say the words that had fleeted and haunted his mind for six years. "You never allowed me to talk that day," he said as he stared at her evenly, "and you never bothered to ask what I thought about it."

Lily kept quiet, a hand silently gripping her dress under the table. "So now," Raze continued, "Six years later, I think it's time I say it to you."

Before he could start, Lily bought up a shaking hand and cued for a pause. She looked uneasily at him, eyes narrowing before saying, "And what is your purpose of doing it? What will it do?"

Raze drew back almost insulted, "Don't tell me you don't want to hear it. It's been long overdue Lily."

"That's just it," she bit back, "It's been a long time Raze. So much, I thought we both had pushed it behind us. Why bring it back now?"

She allowed Raze to take the time to think. Honestly now, she was just tired; tired of dealing with this man and the drama about him that had profoundly affected her life. She had managed to live without him and find a man that she can honestly say she loved. She found a man that loved her back so profusely that she was almost ashamed she could not reach the same level as he. And now, he had given her a child that she knew would grow to be loved by both parents. She was content with that. So now… now the brewing problems of the past had rushed back to her. She was so tired of it.

Raze sighed. He'd been doing this too much today. "Because it is not fair to me," he finally said.

Lily finally bit her lip in anger. "It's not fair to you?" she mimicked insulted, "You…..you don't…. I…I….You selfish man!" she cried out. She was shaking in anger now. Raze watched her delicate white hands clench the sides of the armchair, forcing herself to stay still instead of reaching over and slam his head against the table. She continued to his at him, "You dare…you….you have the audacity to say those words to me after I spent years trying to get over you!? I let you leave! I let you go live the life you wanted! And you dare say that it's not fair to you!?"

"Yes Lily!" Raze finally shouted back. His calm demeanor had left him now, replaced only with the loathing he felt festering for years in the back of his mind. "It is unfair to me! It is unfair that you had all but kicked me out! That you forced me to abandon the one place I finally considered home! That you forced me to abandon the people I thought were family! Yes Lily! It is Unfair!"

Lily snapped her mouth open to retort but he had beaten her to it. "And it is unfair that you wouldn't let me talk that day! That you had convinced yourself that it was what I wanted when you had not asked me at all! You don't know what I thought! You don't know what I felt! You didn't care!"

"That's –"

"So now," he barked at her, "I came here imploring you to let me speak my mind. To let me tell you what I felt. So please Lily…." He had trailed of, trying to catch his breath. The two hand only stared at each other from across the table. Physically, they were so close; so close to agonizingly close to smacking each other in anger. "That is all I'm asking of you."

Lily faltered for a moment before looking away in anger. He could feel her distrust. She could no longer look at him and think that he would protect her; that he was her protector. Not anymore. "And if I let have your closure, you will leave me and my family alone. You will not come back." She had said it like a contract, baiting it like a hook in front of him.

"If that is what you want."

"Then proceed."

He breathed out and sucked in hair before setting his gaze towards her. "First I need to ask. Lily, do you still love me?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter Lily. If –"

"It does not matter," she whispered steely, "now continue."

Swallowing, Raze grounded fists together as he tried to keep his temper. "I always knew that you loved me. Even when were children. I just… I just pretended I didn't to amuse me I guess. It was easier to do that, especially with you." He watched as Lily's stone face drew into a harsher frown. "I did it because I felt sorry for you. I thought that if I would do that, you could at least act normal….ehm…better around me. At least you could look at me without having to look away ashamed because I rejected you."

"I don't need your pity," Lily growled back silently.

"I'm not finished," Raze shot back just as harshly.

"…I hate you." He froze then. From her seat, Lily stood up. She had stared at him then with a face he could not decipher. She placed a nurturing hand against her abdomen, steel blue eyes daring him to stand as well. "Razeluxe Meitzen. I hate you." She had slid past the chair now, calmly walking away from the stunned man that was watching her retreat. "I fear I will always hate you," she managed to whisper as she slipped out of the door and into the darkening always.

She had managed to reach the end of the hall before she had let the shivering overcome her. She wasn't sure why he had that effect on her. He had always managed to make the goosebumps erupt from her skin with the mere sound of his voice. Even Chroix did not have that ability. Silently, she mulled over his words as she walked. All she could register was anger. Anger. Disgust. Disbelief. Pain. …Heartbreak?

She was even more surprised to discover a stray tear had escaped her eye. Wiping it away futilely she glared. "Traitor."

"Lily." A hand had reached out from the darkness and grabbed hold of her shoulder. She couldn't resist the scream of surprise she let out as she had ripped herself away from it in shock, eyes widening in panic and arms flailing to defend herself and her child. She came face to face with Raze now; so painfully close she could see the light blue eyelashes flutter as he blinked.

"What do you want?" she got to the point. She didn't want to see him. He needed to leave. He needed –

"To talk."

She sighed, rolling her eyes. "We did talk."

"Lily." He said, definitively, pleadingly. Please, I swear to you Lily. Give me this moment. Please. Just this moment. "I know you hate me. I know. I don't blame you. I just….I…." And finally, he was a in a loss for words. His mouth opened and the sound he willed to come out failed him. Lily stared expectantly. Tiredly. He knew. He knew his minutes were ticking. He could almost feel the seconds pass by with every beat of his heart and very soon she will tire of him, if she has not already.

"But I…." He looked like he was beginning to choke. He was struggling and he almost faltered as he talked, "But I love you. I learned to love you. I loved you back then and I….I still love you." He grasped the stunned girl in the shoulders and pressed a kiss on her forehead. Yes, he was this selfish. He was selfish enough to confess his love to a woman who was happily married and expecting her first child.

He took hold of her hands gently and gave them a small peck on the back of each hand. "But I promised." He met her daze gaze with a sad smile. He dared look down at the bring wedding ring that adorned her hand to remind himself of exactly what he had lost. "I promised to leave you alone." He gently let go and winced when she had pulled away and took a tentative step back. She was shaking, shaking so hard. She didn't know what to say, she didn't know what to do.

He allowed himself to memorize the vision in front of him now. He allowed her image to burn into his mind before he allowed one more sad smile grace his face. "Goodbye Lily." And he fled.

* * *

Note: Eh….so….this was long. Haha. Actually, I'm amazed my made it. Lily and Raze were never a fav couple of mine. In fact, I don't believe I considered them a couple at all when I played this game. I never considered Raze with anyone, not even Ulrika. So, to make a ten page story about them amazes me. But anyway, I had a vivid dream about this so I had to get up and write it down. I hope I didn't offend anyone or anything like that. I know it's sad, which is not the tone of this game it at all, but I hope you readers enjoyed it.

**Please R&R**! I'd like to know what people think of this because I have yet to see a Lily and Raze fanfic. (Ahem, I doubt there are actually fans of them aside from a select number). Anyway, so sorry for all the grammatical errors. I have numerous ones, I know.

Troublesome_monkey_dono signing out!


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